Merry Brides: Etiquette

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Duties of the Maid / Matron of Honor

By Jasmine Macdonald

When choosing your Maid/Matron of honor you should make sure she is someone you can depend upon through thick and thin as she will play a major role in your wedding. She can be your best friend, or a family member. Some brides are even asking their mothers' to stand up with them as their Matron of Honor.

Here are some of the duties of the Maid/Matron of Honor

1. Provides the bride with advice and moral support when she is frustrated and ready to pull her hair.

2. Helps with pre-wedding activities such as addressing invitations, making phone calls, and running errands. Often accompanies the bride when meeting caters, florist, bakers etc.

3. Helps the bride pick her gown and the bridesmaid dresses.

4. Acts as the head-bridesmaid: organizes bridesmaid's gown fittings, schedules all wedding day hair and makeup appointments, spreads the word about the bridal registry.

5. Pays for her own wedding attire (excluding flowers).

6. Attends all pre-wedding parties.

7. May host a bridal shower (with or without the help of the bridesmaids).

8. Helps the bride dress and stay calm on her wedding day.

9. Precedes the bride down the isle.

10. Holds the groom's ring until ceremony exchange (only if there is no ring-bearer).

11. Arranges bride's veil and train during ceremony.

12. Holds bride's bouquet during part of the ceremony.

13. May stand in receiving line.

14. May sign the wedding certificate as a witness.

15. Helps the bride get ready for her honeymoon when leaving the reception.

16. After the reception she gathers up any gifts, and makes sure they are brought safely to the couple's home.

17. In the days following the reception she will make sure any rental items are returned to the store. She may also take the bride's wedding gown to the dry-cleaners so it can be preserved properly (Hint: The sooner the gown is dry-cleaned, the less chance there are of permanent stains!)

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The Bride Isn't Shy Anymore!

By Linda Ellison

Remember the phrase "blushing bride"? It was thought for centuries that brides were supposed to be demure, shy, quiet and reserved. This attitude was reflected in so many choices for her wedding – including the colors she chose for the bridesmaids' dresses, table linens, and everything else. Pastels were the norm, including soft pinks, pale blues, and mint greens. Everything, especially wedding colors, was subtle and seen as feminine.

Today's modern bride has redefined that word. She is probably someone that has worked, and worked hard. She juggles her own career ambitions while not giving up her desire for a home and family. A blushing bride she is not!

And this is being reflected in her choices for wedding colors, in accessories and other items. Over the past few years, colors have become stronger and deeper. Mint green has been traded for hunter or forest shades. Pale blue has given way to navy or royal. Everything has become bolder, deeper, stronger – just like the bride herself. It's not unusual to see the once taboo wedding colors choice of black or fire engine red to be worked into a wedding décor, and sometimes even those two colors together.

The choices for colors at a wedding are no greater indication of a bride's personality, and this trend of the strong and independent woman isn't going to go away anytime soon, and neither is the choice for stronger and bolder wedding colors.

However, this isn't to say that today's bride is so strong that she's become unapproachable, or that she is choosing strong colors just for the sake of how strong they are. One of the hottest trends in wedding colors today is shades of warm brown and tan. Even for wedding dresses, the bride herself may choose a sash or bow of russet or auburn shades.

The brown family of colors is closely associated with warm, nurturing foods– think of coffee, cocoa, and chocolate. Brown is often seen in nature, another element of nurturing and caring. Even in the application of feng shui, it's encouraged to use shades of brown in rooms where you want to feel relaxed and comforted, such as the living room or bedroom. By selecting wedding colors of these darker shades, the bride may be expressing her nurturing, caring, warm side.

The same could be said of the many shades of green that are fast becoming available. No longer does the bride only have the choice of mint or pale green, but now bridesmaids' dresses and table linens are being offered in stronger shades of celery, jade, and emerald. Hunter and forest greens are also popular, and also may be seen as strong but nurturing. These are two shades also abundantly available in nature, and the term "mother earth" was coined for a reason. When we think of nature or use shades found in nature, these are seen as warm and caring.

Jewel tones of any color are also very popular wedding colors, especially when planning a winter or holiday wedding. When choosing colors that are of a jewel tone, a bride can even mix up the shades for her table linens – emerald green and ruby red for a December wedding, for instance. Adding some sapphire blue and shades of gold can break up the colors and still keep the venue looking festive.

Of course, those brides who still prefer the softer wedding colors of the pastel family have a wealth of options for them. Softer colors never go out of style, and are still seen as being romantic and even passionate. Additionally, by choosing softer colors, the bride knows that they will not overwhelm the setting or theme of the wedding. If you have a large number of bridesmaids and a huge banquet hall, choosing colors such as red and black as your accent can be too powerful, and can even cause the bride herself to get lost in the pictures! The larger the venue and number of attendants, the softer the color shades should be. Of course, these wedding colors can be mixed and matched as well. A bride may opt for her attendants to be in soft pink while the maid of honor is in a darker shade of rose red or light purple. If opting for soft wedding colors, you don't want to make the mistake of having your venue or dresses look washed out or faded. A bride needs to make sure that there are some stronger accent colors to tie everything together.

In the end of course wedding colors are going to be a bride's choice and will no doubt reflect not just her personality but the prevailing trend at the time. Whatever her preferences for the wedding colors – shy and sweet pastels, bold and strong reds and blues, nurturing browns and greens – she has a wealth of options available to her today, and no longer needs to be shy about expressing her true personality in her wedding party!

The Bridezilla Syndrome: Do You Have It?

In a fast-paced world of wedding planning, stress levels are high; immune systems are low; and over the course of the past 20 years, brides have transmitted, what has become a bridal epidemic of our time.

The number of victims has steadily increased; and to date, there is no cure. It's been dubbed various clinical names: Multiple Personality Disorder, Schizophrenia, Temporary Insanity. But in the world of matrimony, anyone who's been exposed - fiancés, family, friends, and victims themselves - this broadening illness has been commonly termed "Bridezilla Syndrome" or "BS."

A contagious condition, BS has become more prominent and has plagued today's busy, wedding-planning woman. In a preliminary study, the disease has spread at an alarming rate. Symptoms of victims of BS - better known as Bridezillas - include reoccurring mood spells, bouts with selfishness, signs of controlling behavior and feelings of meticulousness.

Unfortunately fiancés, bridal party members, friends and family eventually fall victim to the actions and attitudes of a Bridezilla.

Research suggests that symptoms are recognized most often by the fiancé and Maid of Honor, and are completely undetectable by the actual victim. In some cases, a bridal party member, who having had too much alcohol to drink, confronted the Bridezilla. Most often, an emotional, breakdown of the victim would follow, thus intensifying her condition. In a survey of 100 Maids of Honor, an alarming 85% said they avoided confrontation with the victim for fear it would only exasperate the illness.

So we must ask the underlying questions: Where is all this BS coming from? How does one know when she's full of it? Unfortunately the source has not been found; though it is believed that it has existed since the dawn of the institution of marriage. A short-term condition (symptoms persist about 1-2 years depending on one's wedding date), Bridezillas seem to have been unfairly blamed for their actions, for which some believe they have no control, albeit their control over everything else. In fact, it's been clinically proven that a Bridezilla actually does have feelings - feelings of selfishness, insecurity, anxiousness and stress!

Though it's been said there is no cure, there are ways to prevent infection of BS. A survey of healthy brides, whom successfully planned their weddings without contracting the disease, was conducted. Results showed commonalities of the actions performed to avoid the disorder. Doctors, psychologists and wedding planners strongly suggest the following preventative therapy:

1. Keep Perspective - remind yourself that the wedding is only one day in your life. When things get out of control, close your eyes and remember the reason why you are planning this wedding in the first place.

2. Don't Assume Your Groom Doesn't Want to Help - ask him what he'd like to take responsibility for; and then let him. (note: some grooms may follow the cliché and decline this offer.)

3. Know That You Can't Control Everything - realize this and accept it!

4 Delegate. Delegate. Delegate - If you act like you can handle everything, people will let you. Spread the duties.

5. Don't Sweat the Small Stuff - people won't remember whether or not your invitations had those cute little tissues enclosed.

6. Treat The People You Cherish with Love - the wedding is one day; your family and friends are forever.

7. Allow Others to Vent - give your fiancé, family and bridesmaids permission to tell you when you're going off the deep-end.

8. Take the Heat - give yourself permission to hear them.

9. Do Something for Yourself Every Day - the catch is that it must not involve the wedding.

10. No Wedding Talk After 10pm.

Although preventative therapy is available, some brides inherently fall victim and still contract BS. But there is hope! This is not a terminal illness. In fact in most cases, the bride has been known to be miraculously cured once she has returned from her honeymoon. Doctors and psychologists theorize that the change in altitude from flying coupled with excessive levels of the love hormone, Oxytocin counteracts the disease by boosting the immune system, thus eliminating symptoms.

In cases of remission, the disease has been known to resurface when a person, under certain circumstances, may be planning her wedding again. According to research, those brides with a higher IQ score avoided the reoccurrence of symptoms by simply eloping.

Whatever your situation, whether a Bridezilla, fiancé, friend or family member of one -- join in the fight! With love, hope and education, our brides of the future and their bridal parties will have a winning chance against all the BS!

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Gina Romanello, author of Chicken Soup for the Bride's Soul. Noticing many friends and family members endure the stress of planning a wedding, Gina saw a need for Chicken Soup for the Bride's Soul, a Chicken Soup title sure to comfort and enlighten a stressed-out bride planning her big day. Visit Gina's website Article Source: http://ezinearticles.com/Footnote: Preventative Therapy of BridezillaSyndrome provided by http://www.weddingquestions.com/

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Planning Barbie's Wedding Wasn't This Stressful!

By Ciara Daykin

The more you dive into planning your perfect wedding the faster and faster time seems to be flying by. Before you know it you'll be making your grand entrance and then at the blink of an eye the wedding cake will be merely a pile of crumbs on your plate, and the shoes you shopped painstakingly for will be tossed in a box.

Your wedding day is THE DAY that means so much to you. You have so many emotions surrounding this event... love, excitement, joy, jitters, elation. Are you confused? Feeling overwhelmed?

Bridal Blues

Brides often experience post wedding blues. It's hard to explain the feeling but it definitely comes. I know I got it after my wedding was over. But it didn't mean I wasn't absolutely thrilled to be married, I was just sad because my wedding was over (and as you probably know by now, I really love weddings). The day you imagined for so long, and spent at least the last year of your life planning is all of a sudden OVER. Now your other girlfriends are celebrating their engagements and you're not "the bride" anymore. The droves of friends and family that were suffocating you all went home and it's finally just you and your new husband. But you keep reflecting on your wedding, was it what you had hoped it to be? Did your details dazzle??

Getting married is a BIG DEAL! Don't let anyone tell you it's not. Regardless of whether or not you and your honey have lived together, getting married is a big life change for any woman. Hence the reason we all feel the need to throw a lavish party. You need to celebrate this life change!

EVEN BARBIE NEEDED A LITTLE GUIDANCE

Sheryl Paul is a bridal counselor (who knew there was such a thing!) and the author of The Conscious Bride. Sheryl sums it up best when she says:

"...it has become something of a taboo in our culture to utter the words "grief" and "wedding" in the same breath. Yet how could grief and fear not be a part of this transition?! We have the bride and groom letting go of their singlehood and stepping into one of the biggest commitments of their lives; we have the mothers of the bride and groom letting go of their "little ones" and possibly facing their own disappointments about their wedding or marriage; and we have girlfriends freaking out about panty hose color when really they're scared about losing, at least temporarily, their lifelong friend. In short, a wedding, as the rite of passage that it is, involves a loss and a gain, a death and a birth, an ending and a beginning."

This book is a must read for all brides to be. It will really help you to understand that you are going through a big life change and that everyone around you is affected by your transition as well. This book will give you a lot of perspective and you'll finally realize why the little things, like the perfect shade of red for your bridesmaid dresses, are so darn important to you!

Bridal Advice:

Pick up a book that is going to nurture your bridal heart. It doesn't have to be this book, although I really do recommend it. As an expert wedding planner, the most important part of my job is helping my clients plan each detail of their wedding so that the climax of their emotional journey is truly the celebration that they deserve it to be.

Love and Bridal Bliss,

Ciara Daykin

Additional Wedding Reading Sites
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Ciara Daykin is Calgary's premiere Wedding Choreographer. Brides wanting a dazzling, dashing, dream-filled wedding turn to Ciara for all their wedding planning needs. Ciara is a proud member of the Association of Bridal Consultants.
Sign up for Tips & Tricks for the Vibrant & Stylish Bride and Party Host at: http://www.fireflyoccasions.com/
Email: info@fireflyoccasions.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ciara_Daykin

Weddings: Etiquette and Customs

(CL) - Wedding ceremonies may be civil or religious rites. The civil rite generally implies a simpler event, while the religious rite is governed by more traditional rules.

Precise traditions exist regarding the sharing of expenses. Of course, if Cinderella marries a member of the Rockefeller clan (or vice versa), the Rockefellers will no doubt undertake the higher share (if not the entire share) of expenses.

Bride's family expenses: The brides' family is responsible for paying for the wedding invitations, the bride's trousseau and dress, reception and ceremony expenses, the guest party favors, and the automobile and chauffeur (which does not necessarily need to be an expensive limousine service. he may just be an uncle driving his fancy car). If the wedding ceremony is a religious rite, the bride's family's expenses will also include church flowers and decorations, music, bridesmaid and flower girl dresses, ring bearer suits, and the fee for the minister or officiant of the ceremony.

Groom's family expenses: The groom's family is responsible for paying for the rings, the bride's bouquet, the honeymoon, and the future house furnishings.

Wedding invitations: Wedding invitations should be sent approximately one month before the wedding. The bride and groom, with their respective families, should prepare the guest list. In general, the standard layout is as follows: on the left the bride's parents announce their daughter's wedding, while on the right the groom's parents announce their son's wedding. In addition, envelopes should be handwritten.

If the bride and groom are not that young, they can announce their wedding themselves.

Ceremony: The groom's family sits to the right, and the bride's family to the left. Friends may sit wherever they like. The groom should arrive at least 20 minutes before the ceremony begins, and should await the arrival of his bride next to the officiant (minister, justice of the peace, etc.). The groom's attendants stand to the left, and the bride's attendants stand to the right. The bride arrives accompanied by her father and sits to the groom's right.

What the bride and groom should wear: If the wedding ceremony takes place in a church, tradition demands that the bride be dressed in white and the groom in a classic tight. If the ceremony is not formal, he may wear a dark suit. If the groom is in the military, he may wear his uniform. The bride may choose a romantic, practical, or sophisticated style, but whatever the style, if she does not wear a veil, she must at least have an elegant hairstyle, with flowers or some other sort of special embellishment.

What the guests should wear: Men should ware a dark suit. Women should wear something according to the season, either a fine dress or an elegant tailleur. There are no specific rules regarding guest attire. The best advice is to stay within the bounds of good taste and common sense. Of course, female guests should avoid wearing white in order not to compete with the traditional bride. Hats are allowed, but it is advisable not to overdo jewelry (in other words, you do not want to look like a Christmas tree). In addition, it is best to avoid provocative cleavage, even if the wedding is held in the afternoon.

Reception: A wedding reception celebrated in a country house after a ceremony held in the town's church is charming and romantic, but not always possible. In general, the reception takes place in a hotel reception room or at a restaurant. The reception can also take place at the bride's home if it can accommodate all the guests. Depending on the hour of the reception, breakfast or lunch should be offered. These days, the breakfast-lunch combination-or brunch-is also very trendy. Afternoon and evening weddings are generally more formal and are followed by receptions held at more elegant venues, with a sophisticated menu. Food selection is purely subjective. But regardless of the wedding hour or style, the champagne and the wedding cake should not be left out.

Unforeseen events: It sometimes happens that, after sending out all the invitations, the bride and groom decide not to get married after all or decide to change the date of the ceremony. In either event, if the invitation has been sent only to a few close friends, they may be notified by phone. The mother or a friend can be very helpful with this task. If, however, the guest list is extensive, a note or an e-mail message should be sent immediately. If the wedding is cancelled indefinitely, any gifts already received should be immediately returned to the guests. However, the bride and groom are not obliged to give an explanation for their decision or to justify their actions. People's fantasy will take care of looking for a reason.

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Interfaith Marriage - How to Plan an Interfaith Wedding Ceremony

By Cori Locklin

Let’s face it – the world just isn’t as big as it used to be. As a testament to the earth’s seemingly shrinking waistline, more and more young men and women are finding true love outside their faith – and making it work. Yet no matter how progressive you and your families may be, the peaceful merging of two religions can prove an ambitious undertaking. Take a deep breath, remind yourself that love is the end goal, and get ready to celebrate a marriage made in heaven, er, make that two heavens.

Interfaith wedding ceremonies pose a few planning challenges. Here is some advice to get you started:

Do Some Soul Searching - If you’ve been neglecting your spiritual side, it’s time to get reacquainted. Assess your beliefs and the role you see them playing in your life. How important to you is it that your wedding ceremony reflects your religious background? How willing are you to compromise for your fiancé’s beliefs or family? Know your personal stance on faith and religion, so you can speak candidly with your fiancé and your families and make decisions accordingly.

Talk it Over - After you’ve come to terms with your own spirituality, you and your fiancé need to have an honest discussion about religion. Although you should have broached the topic at some point during your relationship, now a wedding ceremony and marriage loom, adding a sense of urgency. During your internal reflection, you may have discovered your own views altering a bit, and he may feel the same. Discuss together your values, and identify what traditions are most meaningful for each of you to incorporate into your wedding ceremony and marriage.

Invite the Families - Combining two sets of traditions while keeping the peace with both families can be tricky. Invite both sides to listen to your ideas and contribute their expectations for your wedding day. You’d be surprised how an honest group discussion can bring about solutions once deemed elusive. As the happy couple, you and your fiancé should be prepared to discuss openly your choices, but you should also be receptive to their viewpoints. Be honest, open and supportive, and make sure that your ceremony plans are agreeable (or at least livable) for everyone.

Get the Right Officiant(s) - While many officiants do not perform interfaith weddings – or only do so with restrictions – just as many specialize in interfaith wedding ceremonies. If either of you has a relationship with the clergy at your respective place of worship, consult with that him or her first. Even if your clergy is unable to perform the service, he or she should be able to evaluate your situation with an open mind and make suggestions and recommendations. Many religious and interfaith organizations maintain lists of clergy who will officiate at interfaith ceremonies. You will also find a valuable resource in your local newspaper’s wedding announcements. Search for the names of officiants who have conducted interfaith ceremonies.

Get Counseled - Counseling sessions, often recommended before a wedding regardless of the couple’s religion, offer a good opportunity for a bride and groom to not only learn about the other's faith, but also to consider ways to merge traditions or celebrations during the ceremony. Since religion won’t disappear after your wedding day, counseling sessions also offer insight to other situations that may arise in your marriage, including raising children.

Plan a Fusion Ceremony - Consult your officiant(s) and families for advice in designing a ceremony that incorporates both faiths and cultures. Determine which customs are personally significant, and select rituals and readings together. Continue this blending of cultures into the reception, and design a menu of personalized fusion cuisine – think egg rolls with a side of Spanakopita.

Reassure the Family - As your wedding plans unfold, remember to pause from time to time and check in with your families, especially if the news of an interfaith wedding was an initial shock for either side. Continue to keep them involved and informed throughout the planning process. Spend quality time together, and if logistics allow, plan some group get-togethers.

Reassure Yourselves - Along those lines – don’t forget to reassure each other along the way, as uncertainty can creep in with potential roadblocks and planning challenges. Don’t stress that you’re losing your religion, because your not. Remember to always keep the focus on the marriage of two people in love, and rejoice that you now have two great traditions from which to draw your spiritual inspiration. Delight in a spiritually rich life and future to come!

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For more ideas and inspiration for your wedding ceremony, visit Elegala.com's complete wedding ceremony planning guide. Cori Locklin is editor-in-chief for Elegala.com and Elegala Magazine. Elegala is a new wedding planning resource offering the most comprehensive portfolio of superior wedding reception sites and wedding services, along with planning tips, photo galleries and checklists to keep brides in-the-know on today's wedding trends and styles. For a complete guide to creating an elegant and memorable wedding celebration, visit Elegala.com, your ultimate wedding planning resource. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Cori_Locklin

Weddings: Etiquette and Customs

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6 Tips on Writing Thank You Notes for Wedding Gifts

By Lisa Gunther

A wedding is the biggest party of your life. Several hundred guests may also be giving you hundreds of gifts. You must thank people for their generosity. Here are some helpful tips to make this monumental job easier. You need to be organized to keep this process as efficient as possible.

1. Order your thank you cards (with envelopes) when you order your invitations. Order 25 extra just in case you get some unexpected gifts or you make a mistake and need to re-write a thank you.

2. Write the return envelopes when you are writing out addresses for the wedding invitations. Whether it’s a calligrapher or you and all the bridesmaids writing out the invitation envelopes with addresses, this is the time to write out the thank you envelopes too. File these in a box in alphabetical order by last name.

3. Use your wedding guest master list when opening presents. This is the computer age, so you probably have your master list of guests in a Microsoft Word or Excel spreadsheet document. Print this out (sorted by last name) and have it handy on a clipboard. Every shower or wedding I’ve ever been to scribbled down guest names and what was given as a gift on the backs of napkins or loose paper. If you’re opening gifts in front of others, have your maid of honor or trusted friend be in charge of recording who gave what on this master list. If just you and your new husband are opening gifts, you can take turns opening gifts and being the recorder. The huge benefit of having your master list already printed out is that you don’t have to try to figure out how to spell anyone’s name. It will all be right in front of you.

4. Write out two or three generic templates you can use. I would recommend writing one to two sentences on each thank you so that your guests don’t feel that you rushed through the thank you’s. You really need to write more than “Thank you for the nice wedding gift. Love, Amy and Robert” for instance. Let’s go with a better example: “Thank you so much for coming to the wedding. It meant a lot to us that you were there. The (fill in the blank) will come in handy in our new kitchen (home) and we will think of you each time we use it. Love, Amy and Robert.” Something like this. Mix it up a little. The first couple thank you cards will go slowly but you’ll get into a groove once you get going.

5. As soon as you get back from your honeymoon, do 10 thank you cards a day until you are done. Some days you’ll be on a roll and do more than 10. Other days you might only crank out 5. But think about it. If you had 200 thank you cards to write, it will take you 20 days. That isn’t even a month. Your guests will be impressed to get their thank you cards so quickly and it will make you and your husband look organized, responsible and grateful. Might as well start off your married life together on an organized front!

6. Keep track of who you’ve sent thank you’s to. Be sure to make a mark (like a “T”) next to each name as you write the thank you. Otherwise, you won’t be able to remember who you’ve sent thank you’s out to. And that would be embarrassing! Drop off your sealed thank you envelopes each day at the post office or leave in your mail box with the flag up so the mailman knows you have a pickup. The job is not done until these thank you’s are in the mail and on their way.

Congratulations on your wedding. I hope you find the above tips helpful. Don’t delay in sending out your thank you notes. It will only stress you out. There is nothing worse than your mom calling you up and saying something like “Aunt Susie said she didn’t get a thank you card yet. I’m just calling to make sure Amy got the gift.” Don’t go there. Get your thank you notes done and over with. Then you and your husband will have more time to enjoy married life.

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Lisa Gunther is a freelance writer and product reviewer. She loves to give advice to young couples. Gunther Invitations is the perfect place for your Save the Date, Wedding Invitations and Thank You note needs: http://www.guntherinvitations.com. If you need bridesmaid gifts try ttp://www.gunthergifts.com/groomgifid.html for groomsmen gifts. Gunther Gifts has engraved and personalized gifts for all occasions such as weddings, birthdays, Mother's Day, Father's Day, graduation, holiday or "just because." Visit Gunther Gifts today at http://www.gunthergifts.com.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lisa_Gunther

Wedding Etiquette - Your Most Common Wedding Etiquette Dilemmas Solved!

By: Cori Locklin

As one of the biggest and most potentially stressful events of your life, getting engaged and subsequently planning a wedding brings with it an onslaught of questions. As times change and weddings evolve, traditional rules of etiquette have followed suit, only adding to the confusion.

To gain perspective, first understand that "etiquette" is above all about treating people with courtesy and making them feel comfortable. When an etiquette question arises, consider the feelings of those who will be affected. To steer you through the fog of questions, I've compiled a quick look at the top five most common wedding etiquette dilemmas: Family Etiquette, Invitation Etiquette, Gift Etiquette, Attire Etiquette and The Cash Bar Issue.

Family Etiquette:

Introducing Your Parents - If the bride and groom's parents have not met prior to the engagement, tradition dictates that the groom's family calls and introduces themselves to the bride's family and arranges a meeting. If the groom's parents do not make the first introduction, then the bride's parents should. Nowadays, who makes the first call is irrelevant; all that really matters is that the parents meet. If meeting face to face is impossible, a letter or phone call will suffice.

Introducing Divorced Parents - If the groom's parents are divorced, the parent with the closest relationship to the groom should take the first step in meeting the bride's parents. If both sets are divorced, the parent closest to the groom should first contact the bride's suggested parent. If no one begins the introduction process, the couple should step in and ensure that everyone meets, while refraining from forcing potentially awkward situations.

Your In-Laws - The groom's parents often feel left out of the planning process. To avoid this, invite your future in-laws into the initial dialogue. You should immediately inform them of your ideas regarding location, date, size and style of the wedding. Take queues on their desired level of involvement and include them accordingly. Let them make offers to pitch in with finances or planning. Above all, keep them informed throughout your engagement.

Invitation Etiquette:

Inviting partners and guests - If an invited guest is married, engaged or living with a significant other, that partner must be included in the invitation. A single invitation addressed to both individuals should be sent to spouses or couples who live together, while separate invitations should be sent to each member of an engaged or long term couple who don't live together. Inviting single guests with a date is a thoughtful gesture, but one that is not required. If you are inviting a single guest with a date, try to find out the name of your friend's intended date and include that person's name on the invitation. Otherwise, inner envelopes may include "And Guest," indicating that he or she may bring any chosen escort or friend.

Guests Who Ask to Bring a Guest - Your guests should know better! It is never appropriate for a guest to ask to bring a date, and you have every right to politely say no. However, if you discover that a guest is engaged or living with a significant other, you should extend a written or verbal invitation.

Invitations to out-of-town guests - Many brides ponder whether or not it's appropriate to invite long distance guests for whom it may be impossible to attend. Use your best judgment. Is this person truly a close friend who would want to attend your celebration? If so, failing to extend an invitation may be insulting. Remember, these days friends and family are often spread all over the country, and people are accustomed to traveling. On the other hand, if you haven't spoken in years, an invitation may look like no more than a request for a gift. In those cases, send a wedding announcement instead, which carries no gift-giving obligation.

Gift-giving Etiquette:

Yes, we all love to receive gifts, and weddings are a perfect occasion for gift-giving. Friends and loved ones customarily honor the commitment of the newly betrothed by showering them with gifts. As the happy couple, just remember to always feel privileged—not entitled. So, let's review a bit of etiquette as it relates to wedding gifts...

1) Never mention gifts (gift choices or gift registry) on the invitation.

2) Publicize your registry information by word of mouth. It's also acceptable to include it on a wedding website or shower invitation (since showers are not typically hosted by the bride or groom)

3) There is no polite way to ask for cash gifts. This can only be done through word of mouth.

4) Honeymoon registries are appropriate.

5) Do not use any gifts until after a wedding.

6) All gifts, even shower gifts, must be returned if the wedding is cancelled or annulled before living together as a married couple.

7) Gift giving for vow renewal, reaffirmation ceremonies or encore weddings is not mandatory, but is a nice gesture.

8) There is no special formula for determining the appropriate amount a guest should spend on a gift. The idea that each gift should cost as much as one plate at the reception is an impractical misconception.

Attire Etiquette:

While rules for modern wedding attire have evolved with the times, there are still traditional standards for fabrics, lengths and styles. Here are some guidelines:

The formality of your bridesmaids' dresses should match that of your wedding dress. Although traditionally the dresses were the same length as the wedding gown, the rise in popularity of tea- and knee-length bridesmaids' dresses has relaxed that rule. As long as the fabric and overall style matches the formality of your floor-length gown, shorter bridesmaids' dresses are perfectly acceptable.

For evening weddings, guests should dress for a nice dinner or event - which includes suits (or black tie) for men and dresses or skirts in sophisticated colors and fabrics for women. Lengths can vary according to the style of the event and location. Female guests may now wear black, but never white.

The Cash Bar Issue:

Yes, weddings are expensive. Yes, couples should be on the lookout for budget saving tips. Yes, weddings are expensive - we know. But never - under any circumstances - should you ever consider hosting a cash bar at your reception. Think about it - you would never ask anyone to pay for a cocktail in your own home. People at your reception are still your guests, even if the event is not held in your house. That said, if a full bar is not within your budget, consider these alternatives:

Host a soft bar, in which guests can order champagne, beer and wine.

Find a reception site that allows you to bring in your own alcohol; you will save serious cash, and anything unopened can be returned for a full refund.

Cut down the size of your guest list - the only significant way to reduce costs in the first place.

Recommended Sites:

Wedding Dress Discount- The lowest prices on name brand wedding dresses guaranteed. Free vacation for two included with every purchase.

Honeymoon Registry
Cruises for less on EasyClickTravel.com

FragranceNet.com's Best Selling Women's Fragrances

For a complete guide to creating an elegant and memorable wedding celebration, visit www.elegala.com, your ultimate wedding planning resource.

Sponsors: Merry Brides Sweetheart Weddings Fun Weddings Ultimate Wedding Guide Discount Wedding Gowns

Article Directory: Http://www.articledashboard.com Cori Locklin is editor-in-chief for www.elegala.com and Elegala Magazine. Elegala is a new wedding wedding planning resource offering the most comprehensive portfolio of superior wedding reception sites and wedding vendors.

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Merry Brides

Duties of the Maid / Matron of Honor

The Bride Isn't Shy Anymore!

The Bridezilla Syndrome: Do You Have It?

Planning Barbie's Wedding Wasn't This Stressful!

Weddings: Etiquette and Customs

Interfaith Marriage - How to Plan an Interfaith Wedding Ceremony

Weddings: Etiquette and Customs

6 Tips on Writing Thank You Notes for Wedding Gifts

Wedding Etiquette - Your Most Common Wedding Etiquette Dilemmas Solved!

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